Welcome to the FUTURE C.D.M. Children Book Site

Books that can make a difference

Home
About Us
Contact Us
Site Map
Blog
Gift for you
Pictures

Overcoming Life’s Addictions:

First of all, it is vital that I report to you I am not a licensed counselor.  I do not have a degree in counseling. The closest thing, for those of you who prefer initials behind the name, is as follows:   In 2004, in the state of Ohio, I was certified with the Ohio Chemical Dependency Board. After two years I let the certification go as (1) I no longer lived in Ohio, and (2)I did not want to spend the money to renew the recertification.

I have worked with youth and children for over 33 years.  In that time, I have learned that, as life and society change--even though children and youth are much the same as they ever were, they also have so much more information which allows them to become more greatly confused than they were even 10 years ago. They have lost respect for authority in ways that are unbelievable. Working with youth 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, will orient and educate you on what’s different about the youth of today.

I pray that this very basic information I am sharing today will provide you peace of mind. My wife and I are ordained pastors who will answer to God if what I attempt to teach you here is incorrect. During my internship in ministry, I was taught by Pastor Charles Barineau, of Donalsonville, Georgia, that I will not only answer to God for what I teach the body, but--get this--I will also answer to God for what the body thinks I say (James 3:1): Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.  Learning this Biblical principal has made me cautious and careful to remain a simple preacher. If I am going to answer to God for what I teach, let me be sure I convey only what I believe the Lord has given me through His Holy Spirit. Additionally, I want to keep it simple so that all may understand.

How can we address addictions? Here is the dictionary answer: “Historically, addiction has been defined with regard solely to psychoactive substances (for example alcohol, tobacco and other drugs) which cross the blood-brain barrier once ingested, temporarily altering the chemical milieu of the brain.”

Many people, both mental health professionals and laymen, now feel that there should be accommodation made to include psychological dependency upon such things (there is—in the addiction recovery field, we define an addiction as use of any activity or substance to the degree that it interferes in a person’s ability to function normally at work, home, or in their relationships), as gambling, food, sex, pornography, computers, video games, internet, work, exercise, watching TV or certain types of non-pornographic videos, spiritual obsession, cutting, and shopping. These behaviors can become addictive as well and cause the participant guilt, shame, fear, hopelessness, a sense of failure, rejection, anxiety, or humiliation.

Now, let’s discuss what causes addictions.  I believe that we all have different personalities and some us arrive in this world with tendencies toward addiction; these folks are more susceptible to addiction than others.  Some families’ struggle more with drugs, others more with alcohol.  Some experts argue that addictions are mainly socially or economically based.  Friends, may I suggest that those of us with addiction tendencies –no matter their source--will fight those tendencies our whole lives. How many of us know alcoholics who switched from alcohol to coffee, smoking, or eating sweets?  Go to an A.A. meeting, see for yourself.  Those of us who suffer with addictions need to be honest with ourselves. I went from smoking five packs a day to zero, in one day, thanks to through Jesus Christ; yet I replaced my smoking behaviors with others that were still addictive. I know of people who went from an addiction that was harmful to an addiction with Jesus. Some would say that is good, but here is what the word says, in James 2:15-16: Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, ‘Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,’ but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it?  To ignore the natural is to lose the spiritual and to stand condemned before God. If you become addicted to Jesus, you can become overly religious and think of nothing but Him, resulting in allowing your brothers and sisters to go hungry, while you sound spiritual yet do nothing. You have just replaced one addiction for another at the same time as accomplishing nothing for God. You are not even a good testimony because you still do not have love to give. Yes, I know this is a hard message, but I am tired of seeing people caught in addictions, not living for God because of their religious ignorance.

The Bible imparts to us that natural comes before spiritual; Paul writes in 1Corinthians 15:46, the spiritual did not come first, but the natural, and after that the spiritual.  I share this in order to contradict those teachings in the church that claim the spiritual is first.  Friends, I challenge you to follow me here:  I believe the Lord wants to provide us both natural (physical and emotional) healing and then spiritual healing, especially in the areas of addiction. Addiction is nothing more than a plan of the enemy to distract and destroy you from reaching all the plans God has for you. (Amen!  This is good!) I count myself as an addict because of my personality tendencies toward compulsive behaviors.   In the 70’s, I loved Boones Farm Mountain Grape Wine.  I drank it so often that I had a revelation, after 3 days of not remembering anything, that I had had an alcoholic black out--the only thing I could remember that I did is what people told me I did. That is the day that I learned that I needed to give up wine because I could not control my use of it.  I started smoking later in life, compared to many, yet I had no control there either. I overate, prompted to some degree by a Mother who, because I was skinny, constantly told me, “You need to gain weight; you look sick.”  I ate two or three helpings at every meal, until I had what they said at the time was a heart attack at the age of 18.  The most I ever weighed as a teen was 145lbs. One year later, after quitting football and getting married, I weighed 200lbs. The habit of eating like I did without the activity caught up to me. Food addictions can be taught; but, remember, in all circumstances--with addiction--we are the ones who have the power to choose when enough is enough. I went from there to a pornography addiction and on to a sexual addiction, which again tried to destroy my life.  Experience can be a hard teacher!

 I wish that simply giving my life to Jesus had stopped all my addictions.  Instead, I now loved the Lord, but still had to deal with all of them.   I still have to choose daily to not let my good become evil spoken of.  I still deal with times of struggling with food, and particularly overeating due to stress. The church will say, “Lay it at the cross and all will be okay.”  Friends, if it were that simple, I would have done it and now be addiction free; but it is not that simple. Those Christians who say that to you heap coals of death upon you, speaking words that condemn and do not encourage.  What we all need, instead, are words of encouragement and some practical means (natural before spiritual) of breaking our addictions.

1.       Acknowledge that you are an addict (After all, Jesus said it is the Truth that sets us free.)  Admit what you are participating in that hurts your body.   God gave you your family; start with them. All addicts lie to cover up their addiction; enough lies will destroy your credibility. Building a reputation for honesty back with family members may take a life time.  Nevertheless, the rewards of living a life no longer in the shackles of addiction is more than worth the struggle to make a choice that will I no longer give in to this behavior.

2.       Find a male if you are a male or a female if you are a female, to be your accountability partner. If you believe an addict will not replace one behavior for another, go ahead and mix male with female.  This is a recipe for disaster!   You will find out that even though at first you may think its working, as time goes on no good will come of it. Friends, that was true for me, even after giving my life to Christ. 1 Peter 5:8 says, Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.   You notice the Word says to be self-controlled rather than spirit controlled. God gave us the liberty to use self-control, which is a part of the fruit of the Spirit. He trusts use to choose wisdom over youthful ignorance or pride (as in, it will never happen to me).

3.       Find a great Christian Counselor to help you get through the emotional and physical end of your addictions. If you need help finding one, please contact me and I will try to assist with locating one in your area.  Some addictions may require the use of short term medications to help you with your body’s physical bondage to chemicals. Do not be condemned again by the Church or the pastors who prohibit you from using a prescribed substance for short periods of time. I personally pray that you do find a God-fearing Doctor who understands his/her calling is from God and who listens to the Spirit of God as well as their medical knowledge. Friends, there are times we need both. Remembering that we as addicts have a hard time with balance in our lives.
A good, godly counselor can help you keep that balance.

4.       Go to work on your trigger points, what tempts you to operate in certain ways. Romans 7:15 says, I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. The Bible covers every area of our lives, yet we do not read the manual. It is just like my behavior with my cell phone.   I just purchased a new one and I had to read how to operate it. Without the book, I would have had a hard time doing the basic functions. I still did not read the entire book, but I read enough to be able to call and to text , which is good. Our Bible, on the other hand, is full of information to help us through our lives.  Even so, unless you incorporate the Word in the Bible into your personal life, it is just like reading any other book. When I gave up cigarettes, I had to also give up coffee for a long time, because every cup I had made me want a cigarette very badly. We need to be honest with ourselves and get rid of the things that bring us down. That may even cost you friends (friends who were friends in name only). A friend would not want to bring you back to chains and bondage. The enemy loves company and He would love to entice you through a so-called friend to come back. Jessie Duplantis had a sermon once entitled, “What In Hell Do I Want.” It really stirred up the religious folks, but what a great point!  During my smoking addiction, I was throwing up blood daily. I could not move without choking and coughing. I was destroying my body.  Worse yet, being ignorant of the harmful effects of secondary smoke, I was even harming my children who I love with all of my heart. What in hell do I want back from those days?  Nothing!

5.       This one is directed to a certain group of people, cutters. As a man who loves God and people, trying to wrap my brain around how cutting can make anyone feel better is very difficult for me to understand. I can see how spiritually it might be viewed as a substitute for the blood of Jesus. When you see the physical blood, somehow it relieves the pain. But, let’s examine something:  1 Kings 18:25, Elijah said to the prophets of Baal, “Choose one bull for yourselves and prepare it first, for you are many; and call on the name of your god, but put no fire under it.
26 So they took the bull which was given them, and they prepared it, and called on the name of Baal from morning even till noon, saying, “O Baal, hear us!” But there was no voice; no one answered. Then they leaped about the altar which they had made.
27 And so it was, at noon, that Elijah mocked them and said, “Cry aloud, for he is a god; either he is meditating, or he is busy, or he is on a journey, or perhaps he is sleeping and must be awakened.” 28 So they cried aloud, and cut themselves, as was their custom, with knives and lances, until the blood gushed out on them. 29 And when midday was past, they prophesied until the time of the offering of the evening sacrifice. But there was no voice; no one answered, no one paid attention.  
Friend, cutting is a demonic activity designed to be a substitute for the very Blood of Jesus Christ.  His blood was shed so that you do not have to shed your own.  He took on our pain, so our pain can be gone forever.   An addiction to cutting-- a very short term solution-- cannot begin to compare with the solution and healing Jesus offers us.  If you are a cutter, admit it, repent of it, and then seek your Christian counselor and an accountability partner. Break this addiction in your life.

 

Let’s have an over view:  Addiction, a device of the evil one, comes to kill, steal, and destroy in you all that if of God. It is going to be broken by hard work on your part and the very blood of Jesus Christ. In Christ, it has already been accomplished!  However, your mind has not acknowledged it yet. I challenge you this day to seek the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, to turn from your wicked ways, so that all the things God has for you can come into existence.

 

 Let’s pray.  Lord, I thank You for this word today and desire that You will receive all the glory for it. I pray that, as people read these words, You would move into their lives and help them through their weaknesses. Your word tells us that when we are weak then we are able to be strong in You. I thank you for Your strength. Lord, we cast off--right now in the name of Jesus Christ--every addictive trait in our lives.  By the blood of the Lamb and the name of Jesus,  we will no longer be held in bondage, but are released from the chains that have bound our families for years. We break the generational curses operating in our lives, and ask that You would freely move in our generation and in the generations to come. Place the right leaders before us to hold us accountable. Lift our hands and theirs when they are weak. Hold us close.   Give us the personal experience of You in our lives. Holy Spirit, have Your way in each reader who reads this. Fill our empty places once occupied by bondage with the Spirit of love and Your deep peace.  We ask this all through you, Lord Jesus.  Amen.